Speak out June 17, 2008
Posted by megcloud9 in Uncategorized.Tags: indian stigma, sexual harrasment, Sir story, social stigma, women
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A breezy Sunday afternoon, sitting by the window sill, gazing out into the perfect blue sky…
Neha: Hasn’t it been ages since we went to meet Ma’am? I wonder how are they all doing. Ma’am, Sir, the kids. What fantastic energy that place had, teaching us and so many students in the most important milestones of our career, During High School, Tenth, Twelfth, they really shaped our future. Whatever I am today, is partly because of that place. Boy, I miss those days
Shweta: (in a very strange voice) I don’t really miss that place…
Neha: What?
Shweta: I said, I don’t miss that place…
Neha: Is something wrong?
Shweta: Silent…
Neha: You were always Ma’am‘s favorite student non-academically, we all loved the song you sang on the farewell day…and how can I forget John and you, all your puppy love days and me being your agony aunt (chuckle!)And the way we would repeatedly solve a 100 math problems and Sir would manage to point out even one small mistake in them (:
Shweta: Still silent
Neha: Do you remember the time when you called John “Sweetie pie” and how he was so happy the whole day in class! I can’t imagine you saying anything like that to him now (:
And on ethnic day, I was quite miffed with all these kiddy guys calling us “auntie!” while we were decked up in our sarees.
Did you go to Sakshi’s wedding? Ma’am had invited me; I went so late to the wedding! Nevertheless I wished the couple and Ma’am .Ma’am and Sir were so happy that their daughter was all grown up now! I heard Sakshi just delivered a baby girl…Did you visit them recently?
Why aren’t you saying anything Shweta?
A burst of tears …
Neha: What’s wrong?!
Shweta: Sir…
Neha: What about him?
Shweta: I went to meet Ma’am and Sir about 3 months ago.
Neha: Then?
Shweta: Ma’am was taking a class downstairs and told me to be seated upstairs in the hall. While I was there, Sir came and struck a conversation with me.
Neha: What did he say?
Shweta: ….
Neha: What went wrong, you have to tell me Shweta, I have never seen you being this upset …I am getting worried now.
Shweta: He came closer and sat next to me on the sofa, I was a little apprehensive at first but I never sensed something was wrong.
Later while talking, he casually stretched out his arms and slowly inched towards my shoulder…
Sobs again
Neha: Speechless…
Shweta: He tried to get closer ,still talking .I was too shocked for a couple of seconds .The next thing I did was get up, he held my arm and tried to push me onto the sofa. I had to push him away and run out of the hall, I was so scared that I locked the door and fled the scene without looking back even once. I haven’t gone back to that place since that day. I was so scared the whole night, couldn’t sleep. Neha, I didn’t want to tell my parents, Ma’am or anyone fearing they would blame me for lying! I didn’t know how to tell you either, I was just too ashamed that Sir could behave this way ….sobs uncontrollably
Image:mediamagnet.com
Sexual harassment is a dark reality…
Educate yourself and speak out against it…Click here
@Megs – hey its really sad that such things happen. I read this post and told one of my friends to read it and she said it happened with her too when she was in her 3rd grade. How sick can somebody get yaa! Its really very sickening and disgusting! It’s time we actually speak out. Speak out loud guys!
As far as that sir is concerned – he’s a pathetic bastard ever! *HUH* Sexual harassment at office, school, classes, train, public places is an offense. Lets speak out as megs mentions about it.
Guys – if you experienced nothing of this sort let’s speak out for the girls.
Some woman once wanted to sexually harass me… She was at the same time, pissed off with me! So, she debated what to do and finally decided to merge the two emotions together and instead of saying, “Fuck off!”, she said the (almost) literal Hindi translation of it: “Aao, pyaar karein!” and walked off!
I was stunned… Should I follow her or should I not… Common sense and a little bit of decency stopped me from going anywhere near that woman for the next ten months..!!!
Men are not ssfe from women any more than women are from men! Loads of women harass men sexually, and we men are so dumb that we think the women are being “nice” to us, when they use words like honey and sweetie pie and darling… Imagine a woman’s reaction of a man used these words to her… She’d call out bloody murder!
It’s an unfair world we live in… But then, if we wanted fair, we chose the wrong species to be born in!
Good post… I liked it… Very effectively written…..
The middle aged men are the most dangerous be it shopkeeper or teacher or boss or someone on train/bus. And usually due to the age & respectability factor they think they can get away. Their wives are pretty dumb too as they live in denial their husbands are sexual predators. Good post!
Gosh this isn’t good, Teachers doing it is absolutely shameful……..
@ Megs
Very apptly written. Need of the day to speak out against this bastard. The other day i read in the newspaper that a 6 year old girl was allegedly raped by the school bus driver! SIX YEAR OLD!
Its getting so common that you never know when u are not standing on the other side of the fence.
@ Nikhil
You have written your exdperience in a humourous way but i know one very close friend of mine who was harrassed till he was almost out of his mind. And there was nothing very humourous in that. Thank God for he had a lot of people backing him, otherwise he would have been blamed, given Indian laws
Just hate it..
All those news reports about school girls being sexually harassed, raped, and some murders.. For god sake, 8-10-12yrs girls!!
Indians are sex deprived!
I guess that’s a stark reality.
Should we have hookers, legally?
Should we be more liberal society?
Should we have more stringent laws of conviction and a faster judicial process?
@Nikhil
Imaging the situation when there are more gays!
Whew.. thought of it freaks me out!
@Megs
Where did you get this excerpt from??
This is DISGRACE…
BTW @meg: you are tagged at my blog..
Its really sick …
Even highly educated men do this … and these are the people who get away with it easily, since most people don’t believe they’re capable of falling to such low standards..
Even speaking out doesn’t help sometimes,
I HATE IT…
@ San
i can understand your feelings, but blame only Indians… its occurring all over the world. Do you remember the father who kept his own daughter in the basement for 26 years and repeatedly raped her… was not from India.
Wherever, whoever, its not a fair world…
Rape/ sexual harresment of any form is disgusting, be it here or any where else.
I think all the girl child (even adult females if they are willing to!) should learn martial arts to protect themselves… too radical but why not?
wonderfully written…I had seen ur scrap on nikhil ’s scrapbook abt crossposting so thought of reading it…as i started reading..i thought what does this post have to do with YU..but then when the post ended..my eyes opened..
what a way to make others aware of this thing
yes this is a big problem.. and something gotto be done ..news related to teachers harassing students comes up every now and then..its disgusting really..i dont know how could they.. …..
anyways nice post..
put it up in youth unite..
@RJ
There are so many incidents that we hear of,of this kind,its become so common reading bout em in the papers but really,this needs to stop…it leaves behind a lifelong emotional scar on the victim
@nikhil
still,i agree,its quite possible today that a man might get sexually harassed but he still somehow remains the stronger sex,maybe physically and escapes out of it,also emo attachement is always a lesser degree with u guys compared to us:)
thanks…comedy king kano neenu
@reema
completely true..esp the wives fact..all women either think their husbands are lord shree rama /know their husbands are terrible and do not bother about it…
@sachin
its a terrible reality that our society is struggling to come to terms with
@sakhi
nothin radical actually about learning martial arts,everyday when i read bout the crime and rape incidents in the paper,i dont feel one bit safe! it is a genuinely good idea to learn them.
and yes,its completely horrifying to read incidents such as the bus driver raping the 6year old …and many many more..what has gotten into our society !
@sandeep
you know,maybe it is too radical a thought to make such laws come into effect..but the “sir” in question here was married,had a daughter older to the victim,was never short of money to visit a hooker or anything..then why did he have to do this to a young girl,who was completely shattered by his behaviour ? it is impossible to justify it…
and as sakhi says,the incident reported about the man who kept his daughter locked up for 26 yrs is enough proof that the problem is with the character and mindset of the man
this excerpt is inspired from a true story..
@joel
will write up all my pending tags soon aftr i am done with exams 
thank u
@anu
welcome to moregyan !
as a woman,it is the ultimate disgrace to see men who r looked upon as fathers,teachers to commit such an act….
speaking out doesnt help the society but meeting a counselor can help heal a victim’s trauma
@arvind
‘ve put it up thr now
thanks a lot !
I think it has nothing to do with money for not visitng hooker or something like that. I think the bastards (sorry to use the prophenities here, but couldn’t help myself!) do it just for the kck.. !
*very angry*
Realy, meg, where our society is going!
’speak out ‘ is the right remedy for this…most of the victims feel nobody will believe them if they speak out the truth about somebody that way…
And most of them (in the age group 7-8) who get molested this way wont even know that they are actually being harrased sexually…Such incidents happen every now and then with young kids(girls and guys) these days…
Its not the question of having hookers,deprived of sex or anything like that…because there would’nt be something called child pornography then…its all in the mindset…
its 7 to 8….wonder how the smiley came there!
8 followed by ) gives
@Meg: Yeah right…! How will I know your interests…
oops..! I read and thought the other way..! don’t bother about the previous comment…
@sakhi
calm down dear ! i know,the corrupt mindset is the number one thing to be blamed here
@bhavna
man,child pornography has reached alarming levels,it is an even bigger threat to damaging the mindset of youngsters..
@joel
huh?!!
Can’t think of any other word other than shocking!!
Its really sad that such things happen. I can imagine what the girl wud have gone thru, being abused by a teacher.
@balu
yeah,shocking indeed but sadly ,true
@radhesh
yeah
Oh, bengloor hudugi.. Where art thou?
hello teddy,stuck up with exams
@megs – hieeee
I have a tv and doesnt need charging 
ssup?
Congrats!!!!!!!
I saw this post in the papers today!!!!
You’re famous!!
yay! You made it to Mirror!!
Congrats kane..
RJ ! ! !
@nikhil
thank u teddy
will not be as famous as my beloved blog mates like u 
learning stuff from all u guys only !
@bhav
thanks kane
A big thanks to Balu who chose this post to be put up on Bangalore Mirror..
It is a very sensitive issue and I really hope people will be more aware and speak out against this issue ..
hey… all this is just not sad its also traumatic for a gal to go through so much of shit and if you notice the person who touches her will most of the time be the one she trust a lot!!!!!
so often its her family member or some MAN who she trusts and adores immensely. you should also keep in mind that even young BOYS through such things……
@Megs – Whoaa!! Megs!! Pretty neat..congrax! Now you made San and me proud!
congrax again fella – you da best!
Wow..megs..congrtzz…posts in newspapers and all….now tell me who is a pro huh???
This atrocity is worsening even further. Its not just girls but boys and prepubescent people as well. Its time parents see their responsibility not only towards their children… But their responsibility towards other children too. Yes… I mean… those who abuses… make sure that they don’t touch their own children. The pace and acceleration in life, culture education and exposure needs checks and balances and sharing information on need to know basis but not on nick of the moment based solution.
My curiosity in this area to delve deeper in to a girl’s heart on chats (Obviously I am not a charming guy to impress someone in looks) came up with worse realities. Unforgettable amongst them was a Filipino girl whose father expired because of which she was entrusted by her mother to her uncle in imparting education. She was just eight and the bastard abused her physically for an year. She could get out of this clutches later and did not tell anyone. Few years later he suffered some terminal disease and wanted to see that girl on his death bed. She refused to go meet him and her mother hated her own daughter for her behaviour. Asked her how ingratiating she could be when she was education given by that uncle and how cruel and egoistic she could be when he was dying…
Mute tears followed with constrained whimpers. She buried that poison deep within her heart until I made her retch and vomit. I thought… some of those flooding tears from her eyes were…shared by my eyes.
It’s not just those criminals we must be aware of. Some times we need to look deeper in to those whom we trust that are our own… but turn out to be demons with others who are not us….
Thank you Meghu… For this…. ironically thought provoking blog
@RJ
@Joel
yeah,kinda getting d “pro” bug from u guys only
@Cheenuray
Your excerpt moved me too…very unfortunate
@Maria
absolutely,nobody is to be trusted these days
Great post Megs….just the right kind of article to be published because people need more awareness about such sensitive issues….
Congrats…you are famous now!
@Nikhil
Thank you
oye!
Enough studying! Now, get back to wordpress!
hello……I dunno what I shld say but all I can utter is very touching!!!
last exam today…..hurray
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Congrats!!! You won the Avant Garde Bloggies Award for this post!!!
http://alchemistpoonam.wordpress.com/2008/12/11/avant-garde-bloggies-awards-winners/
Guys I won !
machi CONGRATULATIONS!!!! TOO GOOD
CONGRATULATIONS and well done
[...] To Sir, With Hatred Author: Meghana Runner up: Public Smoking Ban Author: [...]
thanks Machu,Kaling and nick
Brilliantly presented,
This won an award right? Congrats.